So, i got matching puzzle peice tattoos with Alex today. I feel like i just got married. Its weird. Its a commitment in a way. I guess he truly loves me. Lol he leaves for school in a few weeks. Im dealing alot better. I love him and so does V. they make me happy when everything else in the world wants to bring me down.
Ugh. He’s leaving. Im drunk. Fuck everything.
Me and Alex
Oh my! Today was my first day of work! I got the gas station job. Its a lot of more tiring activites than you think, but its not that bad. A lot of cleaning and memorizing and dealing with trashy Sullivan people but its MONEY. Alex got a job working 6 days a week so i dont see or talk to him much, but are relationship is strong and i feel secure in his love and i am so happy that i have Savannah and Alex in my life and i know sacrafices must be made if were all going to be a family one day :-) Sunday hes taking us to chuckee cheese ! things are hard, but my out look is majorly improved. ive never been so in love with a boy who makes me feel so good and secure. hes a sweetheart! ive been so depressed and i hope i stay feeling happy. i need a little sunshine :-)
Where do i begin? ugh. My boyfriend is a sweetheart. He took me to a cardinals game (my first game ever) and it was so much fun. He even let me listen to Justin bieber ! He did no inherit his thoughtfulness from his father though. No, his father is a monster. He sent Alex this long horrible EMail about how he is offended i have pictures on fb of him with my daughter at the zoo or some shit. Im like seriously? grow up, let him be happy. He continues to say how Im making alexs life harder and how how no one cares about alexs future except for him. Well dude, if it wasn’t for this baggage here, your son would be out smoking weed and getting drunk. But instead he’s responsible, sweet to a child who isn’t use to male kindness and he showed a girl that not all guys are the same. His dad called him arrogant and spoiled. He doesn’t even know his own son if he can call him such things! he says he’s cutting Alex off financialy. He’s 18 and about to go to college. This guys a real DICK. Alex has no responsibility when it comes to savannah. He’s never asked to buy things she needs nor does she think he’s her father. I know this has turned into a rant but it blows my mind how people are so quick to judge and hate someone they have never met! especially a harmless, sweet child! Grow up ya old fart ! damn ! i love him and he loves me. I want to marry him one day and fall asleep by him every night and wake up to him every morning. I want to see his smile everyday and hear him say I love you. This guy is dumb. You can’t tell a teen who to love, it only makes them rebell more. Someone needs to read romeo and juilet..
Went to the zoo with Alex today. V and i got to meet his mom, step dad and siblings. They are so nice! his baby sister is savannahs age and they got along great. We rode the train and went in the little butterfly house and went in the children’s zoo. His dad is an ugly dick head ass hole but im glad his moms side accepts us :-) that makes me feel good :-) its been a hard time about my cousin. I found a silly pic i took of her and i started crying. Out of all the people i have known who have died, this death has effected me the most. I CANT GET THE FACT SHE’S ACTUALLY GONE THROUGH MY HEAD. Im overwhelmed with memories of her. Like how we went grocery shopping with another cousin of mine once and we asked the grocery boy about condoms as a joke. She was so silly. I can’t believe shes gone. She was here and now she’s not. She woke up went to school and never came home. 16 years old. Its just not right. It doesn’t seem right. Love you Emma Rae. Youre an angel now
My cousin was found about four pm today. In the lake. Dead. I keep thinking of before i had V, id go to Wisconsin for the summers and hang out with her. I remember sleeping in the same bed as her and walking to mcdonalds with her and i remember one time i was drinking too much wine and she covered for me. I love you Emma. You were fun and sweet. Your family missses you. Im so sorry you only got 16 years on this planet, but you’re in a better place now. Ill always think of you.
Me and savannah on the train